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Tuesday, March 21, 2023

Breaking the Silence on Special Education My Journey to Self-Discovery

Photo by cottonbro studio: https://www.pexels.com/photo/person-in-white-shirt-with-brown-wooden-frame-4769486/

It's been years since I've been in school, from middle school all the way up to high school, and maybe it doesn't mean that much, but to me it does, you see I used to be in special ed, also known as special education. At the time, I honestly didn't know why I was put in special ed, and when I asked, all I was told was that I was just slow, and needed extra help.

It may not sound like a big deal, but months, years went by, and I didn't know till I was in my late 20's to basically about to turn 30, of what was actually wrong with me, from research I did on my own. After countless hours, I realized that I had dysgraphia which affects writing, dyscalculia which greatly affected my mathematical comprehension, and a slight case of dyslexia, which mainly affected my reading if I read out loud. On top of that, a form of autism. 

I never went to the doctor for any of it, I mean looking back, how could I, when I had no idea what was wrong with me, and none of the teachers suggested to my mom, that I should see a specialist regarding special education needs. The most that happened, was me getting pulled out of class, to work on my reading speed, or writing, but that was pretty much it. So basically for years, I was left feeling dumb, stupid, slow, of basically having a brain that is broken. 

A lot of times, I would just spend most of my time alone in my room, I remember I'd spend days writing poems, and quotes in my journal, and drawing anime fan art, writing and drawing brought me joy, along with listening to music, with music, it felt like a comforting friend that was always there for me, putting into words how I felt, when I couldn't couldn't.

You might be thinking why I'm talking about all this, and to be honest, I don't know either. Maybe I'm just ranting, or maybe I'm hoping that someone out there knows how I felt growing up, maybe my story will reach someone, a parent, a teacher, so maybe the next time, a child or a student shows signs that there struggling in school, or asking for help, maybe just maybe, someone will take the time and really listen to them instead of just brushing them off. Because sweeping a problem under the rug, doesn't make it go away, or fix the problem, all it does is prolong the inevitable, a child living there whole life, not knowing why they are the way they are, or what's wrong with them, or feeling like there broken, and never getting any help, assistance, or tools/ applications that could help make there life easier, or even just a little more bearable. It's important to listen and take action when a child or student is struggling, to not brush off their concerns or struggles as simply being "slow" or "lazy."  I hope my story helps, thank you for reading. 






























































                


 

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